Now we’re pizza snobs

I use my caveman Italian language “skills” and call Pizzeria Procopio to make reservations for our first bites from a Sicilian pizzeria. The outside space they booked for us has a tent with freestanding heaters and my fears are allayed that we will freeze. We are underwhelmed by a review of the menu for appetizers, salads, and desserts, so we focus on the pizzas, which are generously sized and made with supposedly top ingredients. There’s an unwritten expectation throughout Italy that pizzas are “personal” size and each person gets their own. Even though they aren’t sized that way, we are game because it means we get to taste different varieties. We both select pizzas with “Classico” dough made with ancient grains, but they have whole wheat, gluten-free, and a “cereals” crust comprised of sunflower seeds, oat flakes, rye flour, soft wheat bran, flax seeds, and sesame seeds. All of the dough has at least a 48-hour maturation time.

Neither of us can get enough of the Italian red sauce here, so we both ensure our pies feature it. Mine is the “La Piccante,” made with mozzarella, spicy salami, onions, black olives, and spicy oil for 11 euros. Kevin splurges on a 14 euro “La Crudo” sprinkled with mozzarella, prosciutto, arugula, Parmiggiano Reggiano, and a squirt of olive oil. They both were tasty, but not exceptional. The house red wine and its bitter undertones did not impress us, either. We don’t need anything, so it wasn’t a hardship that the servers ignore us, but it does contribute to our lackluster opinion about this restaurant. At 45 euros including cover charges and bottled water (no gas—naturale), we won’t return. It’s ironic to feel this way when we often spent $80-$100 for pizza delivery in San Francisco that weren’t nearly this good. But life is too short to eat average pizza while you’re in Italy, even when they look delicious.

Pizzeria Procopio's La Piccante and La Crudo pizzas, Palermo, Italy